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Chit Chat at the office - Dating, Traveling, False Hopes & Abstinence

We are chit chatting about boyfriends, BC's, FWB's, NSA's, Lovers, penis size, vagina's, clits, positions, etc., and I don't know why when we talk about sex everyone is usually looking at me and when  that happens usually the Dutch comes into question and today they asked when will I be going to see my Master again (what they really want to ask me is when will I be getting laid)...
I had a clueless face, didn't even know what to answer, after what He went through with His health, tired most of the time, sleeping tons, and of course He still have to work :( with the awful weather they are having in NL, my Master is in charge of cleaning out the streets and getting salt on the sidewalks and roads...His job is consuming the little energy he may have through the day.  So any trips I may have been thinking about is not going to happen any time soon unless He tells me to go.

Anyways

Since September of last year I have been looking to date and have dated a bit.  I put my profile on 2 sites, POF, and OkCupid (profiles have been taken down since December 2011).  My girls are just so against me dating because they say I am doing it for the wrong reasons...I want male company to hang out with once in a while, out for dinner, movies, etc., nothing to get emotionally or physically involved with, just some distraction, flirt a little.  I sometimes miss the male companionship, I do want to be caressed, held, touched, kissed, just feel but there is only one person I want it with...Him.

Now...the girls are saying it is unfair on my behalf to mislead the guys that I may be going out with into thinking there might be a possible connection or maybe they will have a chance to get laid.  I guess it is something that is expected this days after several dates, at least that is what I am hearing from the people who are in the dating scene, if you don't connect - you part, if there is a connection then move forward, but the thing is I am not looking for that connection or chemistry since at the moment I am head over heels with my beloved.

I don't want to give anyone the wrong impression or false hopes.  I am not looking for a relationship or to fall in love, I just want to chill and hang out, what's wrong with that?  I just want to meet NEW people.

I know I have a huge problem because I am not physically attracted to anyone other than Him, I can't think of kissing or making love to anyone else, or fucking for that matter, I am committed to our relationship regardless of how dysfunctional it may be at this moment, so why bother even thinking of dating?  That answer is just so easy...I am LONELY!! (I may just be contradicting myself...don't mind me, that's my clit doing the talking)

I am told I am closing all of the doors to any possibility that may be out there for me, maybe a chance to be happy with someone else, love and happiness...but my heart and mind are His.  I have tried to date but I failed miserably, I have gone out with hot ass looking guys *licks her fingers* but I am most happy with my bald, out of shape, tall ass, blue eyes Dutch!  That's the one I love, that's the one I want :)

So I will continue with my abstinent ass, feeling like a virgin, untouched, horny most of the time, drooling when I see people kissing/making out, wishing and hoping, but at least I know I am being true to my feelings, myself and Him.

If and when the day comes that I feel I must move on or I don't think I can wait any longer then I will let Him know how I feel...

Chit Chat at the office is always so juicy.

Sincerely Yours
Aluv

Comments

Sky said…
ALuv. I know how you feel.

My heart belongs to my DM but I too am lonely for companionship. Someone to go out with. Laugh and joke with.

I can't commit emotionally to more than one man at a time and in order for there to be any sex I have to connect emotionally.

I know where you are coming from.

Hang in there. If you figure it all out, please let me know lol

Fondly. Sky
ALuv said…
(hugs Sky)
it is hard Miss Sky, but if I figure something out I will let you know for sure!!!

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