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REMINDER - why i am my Masters' sub

I do hope by the end of this post i can find an app that will allow me to put a recording on this blog that I was told I must add at the end of it

I have been going through a lot of crap trying to sort out my thoughts, ideas, with the new apartment coming, many many changes, inevitable changes 

Through it all I know always give me advice and best of all, listen when i just need to let things out

I never feel that i have to hold back, in other words, i feel comfortable telling him everything, and since i don't do anything i should not be doing, at least things that would be considered dishonest from me to him, i am an open book, so basically i keep myself on check so there will be no reason for doubts, mistrust, miscommunication, or having to lie to cover my tracks, that way I can always feel i can go to him and have the ability to do so no matter what the case or subject may be

my Master is very busy during the spring and summer, his busiest seasons, and it has been like that since i've known him (almost 6 years)
during this period i also tend to go dormant, not communicating with him as i should and bringing things to his attention instead of me letting them boil until i can't take it and then explode
often thinking that i don't want to put my problems on him and give him more load when i know he is overloaded as is
yeah, here i am thinking i am doing a good deed
then again...

i am not the one to decide how much is too much for him or how much can he take or not, it is for him to decide
i was thinking for him, deciding for him and that really is not my position to do so

now, this is not the first time we've had this conversation
it is not the first time he had to remind me
not to assume or think for him
he is right

i guess for me to have it as a reminder I have to post what i did and consequences for my actions
i am going to be getting a spank for that one too, not that i mind, in fact when he spoke firmly to me it was like a rush from the tip of my hair down along my spine around my ass to the tip of my clit, goosebumps all over and in between all those emotions i still felt so ashamed that once again he had to remind me of something we had already discussed quite a few times

so i know he in charge
show me who is Master
remind me of who is slave
he says...
"cum for me my slut and record it on voice"
of course as soon as he says cum i am panting, looking around because all this time while we are having the discussion i am laying on the grass looking up at the sky, people going by as they walked their dog or just took a nature walk
as soon as i was done coming he asked me if i could put a recording on my blog, and i am still trying to figure it out
as i walked back to the car once again he makes his request and of course my body is happy oblige 
walking and cumin, couldn't help the moaning, second time so it took a bit more out of me, some cars driving by me on their way to park looking at me as i'm trying to turn away because the expression on my face and the way i had to suddenly stop like deer on headlights.  i really wanted to run but my car seemed so far away, could not move fast enough, my legs shaking, a bit light headed

When he tells me to post or write something for him i get very nervous, i cant even collect my thoughts the right way, my ADHD kicks in full force and the mental blocks come ago
not to mention i have a friend of mine at the moment sitting across from me in Second Life and she feels the necessity to read me all the conversations she is having, why?  I have no idea, maybe to include me
basically this post was a challenge to write in more ways than one

i have yet to find a way to add the recording
no apps as of yet
so if anyone knows of an app i can use to add a recording please let me know, it would be greatly appreciate it

Sincerely Yours


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